The date is set, but the question you might ask now is how to prepare for mediation.
So, how do you prepare for mediation, and prepare well?
Well, there are some things you can’t control in a mediation. Other things you can.
For example, you can’t control what the other party or parties bring to the table. Nor can you control their willingness to negotiate. Further, you can’t control the outcome, because there is more than one party involved.
However, what you can control in mediation is what issues YOU bring to the table. You can also control your own outlook, and your own willingness to consider different options for resolution.
Finally, you can control whether you are willing to talk in ‘good faith’ and with a view to resolving the outstanding issues between you.
How to prepare:
The first thing you need to prepare for mediation is a pre-mediation meeting with your mediator. Why is this important? Well, it allows you to think about the issues you wish to discuss at mediation, and your goals or hopes for the discussion. In this session, your mediator will make sure that the process is going to be fit for purpose, and that you are as prepared as possible going into the joint mediation. (You can find out more about my own processes, including the pre-mediation session, here.
Following your pre-mediation session (or sessions, if needed), you can also take the following steps to prepare for a joint mediation:
1. Consider what your issues and goals are for mediation:
Mediation is your process, and you get out of it what you put in. Ask yourself:
1. What are the issues to be resolved?
2. What are your goals in reaching agreement?
3. What is important for you to say in mediation?
4. What do you think the other party/parties would say to these questions?
5. What can you do to help make agreement possible?
2. Identify potential road blocks to agreement:
There is a reason you are trying mediation to resolve your dispute. Ask yourself:
1. What is stopping you from reaching agreement?
2. What discussions have you had so far (if any), to try and resolve the conflict? What happened?
3. What needs to happen before you can reach agreement?
4. What would the other party say to these questions?
3. How will you look after yourself during this process?
Mediation can be an exhausting process, both physically and emotionally. Ask yourself:
1. Do you need any support in the mediation (e.g. from a lawyer or support person)? If so, you should discuss this with your mediator.
2. Will you take the day of mediation off from work? If not, will you plan to take some time off after the mediation, before getting back into your day?
3. Will you give yourself time to reflect on the mediation and what needs to happen next?
4. Can you plan in some self-care either that day or later in the week, such as going for a walk, having a massage, or something else that will help you relax or refresh after mediation?
What’s next?
Hopefully, this article gets you thinking about what you can do to prepare for mediation. So what’s next? To chat more about the mediation process and the steps involved to prepare, you can call Renee Toy on 0490003325 or contact Listen Talk Resolve here. You can also visit our Facebook page here.
